after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
