Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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