I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
