I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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