hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize