nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
