I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
