I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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