in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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