Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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