WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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