Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
