no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
