yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I feel like a drive thru vagina
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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