god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
