yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
