ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
