His pubic hair was longer than his dick
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
