oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just gift wrapped bread.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize