I'm so fucking centered right now
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
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