oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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