that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize