What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I wish life had little blips of pornography
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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