why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
