can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize