it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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