if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
