Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
