I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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