Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
PANTIES FOUND
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