Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
We got so high we made milksteak
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
