he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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