Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize