the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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