Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
