Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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