Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize