I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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