Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
