i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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