What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
