Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize