dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
She announced her abortion via fbk
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
