Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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