so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Four minutes until I can fart!
I'm passing your future prison.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
