If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Randomize
