do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
