She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Randomize
