Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
