my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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