The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize