just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
