We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
